Expectations

My poetry is written to be performed/heard aloud. So I'm slightly opposed to typing it out for others to read. My inflection and brilliant stage presence will be all for naught! But what the hell, right? Here's a super-shorty for y'all anyways re: boyfriends as of late...


Do not put me on a pedestal

Your expectations
Of a super-style girlfriend
Are plain exhausting

And I've been tossing around the question of why
You keep trying to keep me tied up here
So high up here in your head

Do not put me on a pedestal

I'm not that super
I can't shoot lasers from my eyeballs
And long falls leave me in stitches
And/or casts

Cast aside visions of me in spandex and lycra
or a rubber cat suit
See my taste buds
are in cahoots with the chocolate
So I don't pull those out on a regular basis

I can't fly
And I've never stopped a bad guy
From accosting a little old lady
Though I'd try
If I came across the crime in progress

My super-bio would read as follows:

Super-Britt!
Why she's faster than a speeding turtle
She hurtles tall-ish children in a single bound
(Leap-frog styles)
She dodges mullets with ease
And her spelling capabilities are astounding

But as she IS a human
Do not put her on a pedestal

She never fails to disappoint